Announcements

I've set up a multi-author social blog to be used by my part-time blogger friends who don't want one of their own. Send me a note if you'd like to be able to write on For Consideration

Monday, June 26, 2006

On courtesy, kindness and respect

What is to blame for a society seemingly slipping rapidly toward total crassness...where being punked is entertainment, where the busiest websites are those that show people fighting, where somebody's need is always seen as brought on themselves and never your duty to help (unless it's your need), where kindess is a sign of weakness, where entertainment is videos in which women degrade themselves or it's peaking into the lives of others, where someone met is analyzed for their weaknesses to exploit versus their strength of character?
Whatever happened to smiling at strangers instead of glaring at them to make sure they understand you're not to be messed with? To those of you who try to be kind to everyone, you know what I'm talking about. How many times a day when you're walking down a sidewalk or an aisle in the grocery store do you make way for someone who makes no effort to do the same for you? How often do you get a wave of thanks for letting someone merge in front of you in traffic?
I'm not talking about the phoney yes, sir and yes, ma'am of the over-aggressive service industry. You know when someone is genuinely kind and respectful, especially in this day in age when it's become so rare.
Do we blame a society that's sole measure of success is the accumulation of wealth or is it that we no longer look inward to resolve problems but look outward to blame instead? There have always been mean kids at school but it seems more and more every day meanness is the rule instead of the exception.
Frankly, it's a parenting issue; and therefore, we can turn this around. We as parents and adults need to make sure our children understand what we really value. We value a society where people care about one another, where others walking on the sidewalk are potential friends, not the obstacles of an overly self-absorbed life; that we value a society in which people respect one another, rather than degrade or disrespect others for our amusement. We need to ensure that kindess is repaid with kindness, a genuine thank-you. Every person you interact with is a human being with real feelings. Doesn't it appear that everyone acts as though they're playing a video game in which they're the only human being in it?
So before we've slipped beyond any hope of return into a total instant gratification, self-absorbed society, start turning it around with an act of kindess. Help a friend, be courteous to a stranger and respect everyone. Better yet, go out of your way to help someone and see how great it makes you feel.

The true measure of a rich society is not the number of millionaires, it is the happiness and wellbeing of the whole.

4 comments:

David said...

Right on the mark Zeb! As a society, we need to get the cell phones out of our ears, ignor the text message when we are in conversations, drop the "me first" attitude, and quit thinking of "values" as some political football to be tossed around to make us feel good about our candidates.

The interstate is not the Daytona 500, and merge means allow others to get in line.

Oh...one more thing...families need to have more conversation at the dinner table and less at the drive thru window.

LittleCuz said...

Well said Zeb, and an oppurtunity to relate a story. I was driving up to the pump one Sunday at a small store. There are 2 pumps, each with 2 hoses. A full size, and I mean full size, puckup was pulling in on the ohterside, there were 2 cars already at the pump so we had to be nose to nose. Now we're pulling up at the same time. She, the driver, keeps pulling ahead, I had to stop, a quick look told me the hose wouldn't reach. Noting that she had stopped her truck so the tank was right next to the hose in the pump, I, politely I might add, asked her if she could please back up a foot or so, so the hose would reach my tank. You'd have thought I'd asked her to sacrifice her first born. After the disgusted look and grumbling she did back up enough for me to pull ahead enough for the hose to barely reach my tank. When I went in to pay for the gas she was already gone. Another customer who had been at the pump on the opposite side of me, made the comment "You were getting no love from her were you?", so it wasn't just me.

David your comment about yielding is so true as well. People keep saying that you can't legislate niceness, but it seems it's the only way to get it today. I complain about people not yielding and I get, "Well by law they don't have too...". And that is the problem, no one does anything unless they have to "by law".

Zebster said...

Wow, I should've had you folks write this for me or I should've been closer in time to an actual incident, so that I could rant with much better passion like AA.

El Mas Chingón said...

Well said, Zeb! Too often people get the wrong perception of me when they mistake kindness as weakness. On the other hand, I've noticed I've been the exact opposite when confronted, as if it's a defense mechanism in today's society.

The lack of kindness and respect is not only a societal problem, but it's one that's uniquely American.